


Delayed Reaction

by quasiouster (QuasiOuster)



Category: The Good Doctor (TV 2017)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-20
Updated: 2020-03-20
Packaged: 2021-02-28 20:41:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 17,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23223436
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QuasiOuster/pseuds/quasiouster
Summary: Neil and Claire get called away for a work trip. A misunderstanding leads to unexpected revelations about their friendship. A mostly slow burn Claire and Neil adventure with a few cameos from some of the other characters. Very slight spoilers for the preview of the season 3 finale.
Relationships: Claire Browne & Neil Melendez, Claire Browne/Neil Melendez
Comments: 70
Kudos: 173





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this over the weekend and have been feeling a little cross with myself that it's taken so long to edit. But then I realized how long it had gotten! In the midst of such a difficult and chaotic time for so many people, it's been nice to have a fun distraction. Thanks to all the folks writing out your head canon and for all the lovely people reading. Stay safe!

Claire had barely been gone half a day before the rumor mill started.

She deleted a third text asking about her work trip, this time from one of the trauma nurses who thought it hilarious to add a string of annoying emojis: flame, heart eyes, winking smiley face. The tone of Claire’s response wasn’t as whimsical. That earned her a laughing emoji in return. The latest news proved too tempting for her work friends not to comment on, apparently.

Newsflash: Dr. Claire Browne and Dr. Neil Melendez. In a hotel. In Vegas. Overnight. Claire couldn’t believe they were stuck together.

This latest drama came courtesy of a patient in critical care who’d recently undergone an experimental surgery she and Melendez led. He’d been recuperating nicely but collapsed in Las Vegas while visiting his son. After talking it over with Dr. Lim and the hospital in Nevada, she and Melendez had flown out to assist the surgical team there.

Of course, the gossip hounds weren’t treating it like the medical emergency it actually was but another chance to stoke the tired flames of the Browne-Melendez Favoritism Conspiracy Theory.

The timing also stunk, to add insult to injury. The slower than usual pace at St. Bonaventure meant that she’d made good progress on an article she and Park were submitting to the American Journal of Surgery. They’d both set a deadline for the end of the week to finish a first draft, and this side trip threw a major monkey wrench in that plan. If she was being honest, the workload she could handle; the root of her stress related to something else entirely. Namely, the whole being alone with Neil Melendez.

Spending so much one-on-one time with him didn’t appeal to her at all. Or rather, it appealed to her too much, and that was the problem.

Turning back to the notes in her patient’s file, Claire chastised herself for that train of thought – her patient deserved her commitment and undivided attention, not a petulant bad mood. She hated how everything had gotten so complicated between herself and Neil, but she made sure it never affected her work or devotion to her patients. Not that she regretted building a friendship with her attending. After her mother’s death, Neil’s mentorship and sympathetic ear played a huge role in keeping her from a dark, destructive road.

Maybe because Neil had known her longer, he’d gotten through to her in a way Alex and Morgan hadn’t, though they’d made a good effort. Even now a few years removed, it seemed unreal how overwhelming her pain had been then. To this day, it still mattered that her co-residents had supported her – and covered for her – while she worked things out. She sometimes thought about that day when Neil had sat with her silently as she sobbed, understanding nothing about her situation except that she seemed close to breaking. He somehow realized that his companionship without judgment meant more than platitudes or sage advice. After, he pushed her to listen to her therapist, gave her an outlet when things got to be too much. He reminded her that her compassion was a gift that he valued about her, even if it sometimes meant getting hurt. She couldn’t accept that coming from Morgan or Park. Yet coming from Neil, she let herself start to believe it might be true.

And when her feelings for Neil deepened, it shocked and embarrassed her. After all the righteous arguments she’d made about their platonic relationship – the harmlessness of the runs and dinners and after-work drinks – she'd been the one to cross the line emotionally. The situation with Dash had only complicated things. She couldn’t trust herself not to hurt Neil either.

Except at times, she thought Neil felt something there too. After she’d texted him about Morgan admitting to the favoritism complaint, it’d been _his_ idea to stage a fight to distract her and Andrews. He’d insisted their friendship was worth it. It was one thing to tell her he valued her as a colleague and that she pushed him to be a better surgeon, even dancing with her under the guise of making their patient happy. But revealing that she made him a better person? How could she not think more of that confession? He’d actually said those word to her; she didn’t imagine them. Yet, nothing positive could come of digging deeper into what he’d truly meant or confessing to him the emotions he’d stirred in her. It would ruin both of them professionally to even suggest such a violation of boundaries, and she’d lose both a mentor and a friend.

So, after dissecting every angle with her therapist, she’d committed to never letting Neil know how far down that road she’d gone.

Then when the earthquake had happened, she’d come close to destroying everything when Neil got hurt. In her panic, she worried that she’d regret it forever if he died without knowing what he meant to her. Yet when they’d all finally reunited, his brush with death hadn’t seemed to change anything for him. Oh, he’d been worried about all of them, relieved to see they were fine, happy to just be alive. But her heart had wanted – had expected – something more.

That’s when she knew for sure the attraction was one-sided. And she realized something had to change.

Things with Dash concluded much more reasonably. They’d promised Kayla a genuine attempt at a relationship. Dash would offer Claire that box of recipes when he felt ready, and if Claire accepted, they’d both make the effort – hopefully, start by cooking dinner together and go from there. It didn’t take long to realize what they’d both known from the start: their love for Kayla would always be a barrier to any truly long-lasting romantic relationship. The root of their affection for each other came from their shared history, inextricably tied to memories of the loved one they’d lost. The acceptance of that came as a relief, really.

She’d didn't tell Neil about that either, and strangely, he never asked. Months later when it finally came up that she and Dash hadn’t been seeing each other in a while, he’d looked surprised. Claire worried at the disappointment she sensed, too, in his expression, probably conceding that she genuinely didn’t know how to get close to men without hurting them. Defensive, she’d almost brought up her suspicions about him and Lim being back on, but wisely kept her mouth shut.

Their casual friendship became the hardest part to give up. They still had the occasional runs, easy late nights working on a medical case, a rapport that reflected their mutual respect and comfort with each other. But an unspoken agreement put a stop to the dinners and outings. And shades of an undefinable distance emerged between them as well. They’d both tired of fielding the rumors. All of Neil’s residents had made snide remarks, and Claire knew Lim had been on him too.

And well, Claire couldn’t stand to be so close to him knowing how easy it would be for her to fall completely in love. After a few weeks, all of the talk died down anyway and some new drama filled the gap of aimless work gossip.

Finishing her surgical residency made it easier, too, despite continuing in the same cardiothoracic specialty as Neil – easier mostly because they didn’t work as closely now that she had her own patients and rotation different from his. Claire saw Park and Morgan all the time since Park had chosen a trauma surgical specialty and Morgan would hop on any surgery to enrich her short career in the OR. Shaun opted to continue his residency in neurology, so she saw him less but often enough.

She never told anyone about her feelings for Melendez. No one could ever know.

Sitting around reminiscing about her sad life and even sadder relationship with her former attending didn’t seem like a good use of her time. It was done. They were here. She had to get over it. Hearing a ping on her phone – and relieved it wasn’t another nosy text – Claire answered a minor question about a patient her colleague agreed to monitor while she was away. As she packed up her files and checked how long it would take to order a car, the rumbling in her stomach reminded her that she’d meant to leave hours ago to check into the hotel.

As if his ears were burning, Neil came strolling into their temporary office. He set his briefcase on the chair next to her and checked his phone absently.

“Hey, I thought you’d be at the hotel.”

Neil still looked pretty relaxed, excited even, a sure sign he felt confident about the surgery they’d conduct in the morning. He’d spent the afternoon getting all the necessary approvals for their admitting privileges to lead the surgery, which involved coordinating with the surgical team personnel about needs. Claire’s job had been to make sure the patient remained stable and reassure him about what to expect, likely finishing up before Neil. Rather than wait around for him, it made more sense to touch base at the hotel if anything came up.

Their patient had other plans, though, and Claire easily recognized the nerves underneath the tough exterior. Figuring she had extra time, she’d sat with him for a while to take his mind off the fact that he could die on the table the next day. They chatted about a couple of TV shows he liked – she’d listened and vowed to give them a try. They’d made fun of the uptight doctor who’d checked in on him as they talked, and he’d recounted his pride over his son’s first ever comedy show as a headliner. That’s how he’d ended up in Vegas. Before she knew it, almost two hours had passed. Her patient had actually kicked _her_ out, thanking her for the company and assuring her he’d be on good behavior for the night staff.

“You know how Tim is,” she said, finally answering his question. “He had to tell me all about his son’s show and then all the television and movies I should be watching.” Neil grinned, understanding perfectly their patient’s coping mechanisms. Claire chuckled thinking about the light-hearted jokes their patient had made at Neil’s expense, too, mostly about his tattoos.

As she tidied the table where they’d spread out journals and notes, Neil watched her pack up. Claire had brought an extra bag for her research materials, not that she’d honestly thought tending to their patient would give her a lot of time to work on her article. Seeing her struggle with the load, Neil grabbed her briefcase, only handing it back to her after she’d gotten herself settled. Claire nodded and smiled tightly in thanks.

“We can head over to the hotel together then,” Neil said off-hand, checking his watch. “Maybe grab an early dinner before the crowd. I heard there were two huge concerts happening and the town is overflowing with tourists.”

Claire winced. “Of course, there are.” Neil chuckled at her reaction having already heard about how much she hated Las Vegas. They headed out the door together, Neil flicking off the light as they left. “I should work on my article, though. Park is going to be annoyed if I don’t make any progress.”

“You gotta eat,” Neil countered, flashing a familiar smirk in her direction. “Come on, it’ll be quick.”

Classic Neil Melendez charm. As they took the elevator down to the main floor, Claire’s face warmed, and she shook her head.

“Besides,” he added, I wanted to talk to you about the resident interviews you sat in on.” Claire had been chosen as the cohort representative for the vetting process, more because no one else wanted to do it. It had been mostly interesting and also weird choosing the young doctors meant to replace you.

“You want to compare notes, don’t you?” Neil didn’t deny it, but threw her another of those cocky glances.

“I value your opinion, Dr. Browne. Especially when I know what I’m up against if I have to go toe to toe with you.”

She laughed at their running joke, his mock annoyance about being on the wrong end of her persuasiveness. He continued to stare at her, challenging her to say no, even as they both knew she’d agree.

“You’re buying, of course.” Neil nodded and grinned smugly all the way to their rental car.

This was what always happened: they’d be somewhere alone, he’d be playful and charming in a completely harmless and platonic way, and she’d waver and fold and make excuses for why he had this effect on her. Even after all this time, she couldn’t get him out of her system – she hated how hard she had to work sometimes not to be attracted to him.

* * *

It only took five minutes to drive to the hotel. They hadn’t strictly needed the rental car, but didn’t want to be at the mercy of cabs or car services if they had to rush out for a medical emergency. After checking in, they’d met up again at the hotel restaurant and, as promised, ate a quick dinner where they mostly agreed about the resident candidates up for contention. They’d even shared a laugh at one they’d called mini-Morgan for her bald ambition during the Q&A.

As usual, their downtime with each other naturally turned relaxed and comfortable, their friendship and understanding of one another making conversation flow smoothly. The ease of it all often fooled Claire into forgetting how much she’d ached for so much more at one point. And then she’d experience a flash of irritation at how pathetic she sounded. Even as she’d watched him date other people – including a brief resurgence of his relationship with Dr. Lim and a girlfriend he’d seen for the better part of nine months – she’d feel the sting of longing. Eventually, she’d have to get over it.

Instead of lingering and torturing herself further, she excused herself to go work on her article after Neil paid their check. He’d looked tempted to tease her again, but instead told her not to stay up too late and mentioned going for a run before turning in for the evening.

An hour later, she again watched Neil stroll toward her, confused expression over why she was now back in the lobby with her papers and laptop spread out on one of the coffee tables.

“What’s got you out here? I thought you were hunkered down in your room?”

From his clothing and demeanor, Claire could safely assume he’d gone out for that run or maybe had hit the gym. His t-shirt was slightly damp and clingy with sweat and his slightly loose but annoyingly snug pants looked more rumpled than usual. Before he sat down next to her, she watched two women do a double-take as he passed, eyes lingering on the frankly alluring picture of Neil Melendez in motion. They followed his trajectory to see Claire at the receiving end of Neil’s attention and pouted to each other. That did give her a bit of satisfaction.

Claire shook that thought from her head and focused on his questions.

“Ugh, it sucks actually. There’s a group of dudes here for a bachelor party next door. The hotel’s full, and there’s nowhere to move me. It’s not the best environment for concentrating.”

“Ouch” He leaned back in the chair crossing his feet in front of him. “Did the hotel say anything to them?”

“I think someone went up there, but it didn’t help much. I mean, they’re not out of control, but when you’re trying to work on something …” She waved it off. “It’s fine. I can work down here, and I have earplugs that should help me sleep.

Neil’s brow furrowed, clearly concerned. “Did you tell them that you’re a doctor and have an important surgery tomorrow?” For a moment, Claire thought he might storm over to the registration desk himself and start making demands.

“No, Dr. Melendez, I did not play the doctor card.”

“Well, you should have,” he argued. “It works.” His mischievous grin amused her and reminded her of a young boy up to no good. He picked up one of the articles she’d been reviewing as she inserted her citations into the draft. “You’re using this study? Interesting.” He continued to read, flipping pages and tilting his head every so often as he absorbed the text. Claire rolled her eyes at his curiosity. He acted like this naturally cool genius, but he was as big a nerd as the rest of them.

Finally, he put the article down and sifted through her pile of sources. “I can’t wait to read this. Based on your research angle alone, I think you’re likely to get published, and pairing it with Park’s section should make it even stronger.”

Claire ducked her head, always at a loss for words when he praised her so adamantly. “Uh, thanks. It’s been fun to research.”

Neil nodded absently and began asking her a few questions. Before she could process how it happened, they were engaged in a full-blown brainstorming session. He grabbed her laptop and began reviewing the draft she’d been plodding through for the last three weeks, offering suggestions and looking a few things up himself on his phone to prove a point. When a particularly loud group of party-goers passed by their corner, they looked up and realized that a couple of hours had passed. It wasn’t late, but if they wanted to be well rested for their surgery, it seemed wise to turn in for the night.

Gathering Claire’s papers, they continued to chat as he walked her to her room on the same floor as his but in the opposite direction from the elevator. When they arrived, he could hear the revelry coming from next door. Claire rolled her eyes as she unlocked her door and he followed her in, already agitated on her behalf. Neil looked around, probably noticing she hadn’t unpacked, although she’d taken a shower before their dinner and left a few files out on the desk about their surgery. On the other side of the wall, muffled voices could be heard, not loud enough to call security, but definitely annoying.

“Earplugs it is,” Claire declared. “Thanks for bringing my stuff up. Now that I think about it, I did bring an awful lot of crap with me. I guess I got distracted by all the noise.” She chuckled and directed Neil to place the papers and folders he held onto the dresser area.

“You sure you don’t want me to go downstairs and play the doctor card,” he inquired, mostly kidding, but he’d probably do it if she gave him permission.

“No, I’ll live. Next time, though, Airbnb.”

Neil laughed heartily. “Oh yeah, because what the gossip mill will love more than the idea of us staying overnight in the same hotel is the two of us sharing an Airbnb.”

Claire’s heart sped up at the comment. She always thought he was oblivious to the occasional chatter about them – he rarely mentioned it. But apparently, he’d been listening.

“Well, it’s been a long time since all that business.” She tried and hopefully succeeded in sounding casual. “I’ll take the gossip mill over this, right now. Not that I have a choice.”

Neil stared at her intently, expression unreadable. She was about to ask if something was wrong when he spoke up. “Hey, why don’t we just switch rooms. It looks like you’re mostly packed and so am I. And I can fall asleep and stay asleep through anything.” Claire raised a brow at his suggestion. “And if the boys get too rowdy next door, I’ll either bang on their door or play the doctor card downstairs.

Claire chuckled. “You are really itching to do that. I wonder if you have a complex.” He shrugged. “That’s very nice of you to offer, but it’s not –”

Walking over to where she was packing up her stray papers, Neil looked directly down into her eyes. “It’s not a problem. I want to do it.” He held her gaze, the intensity sending her heartrate through the roof again.

These moments continued to make her question everything about what he felt for her; how he’d react if she admitted how she’d once felt for him. How she still feels right now at times like these. Instead, she shook her head, not trusting herself with words.

“Come on,” he prodded. “Stop being so difficult, and let me be helpful.” 

Claire didn’t know how much more she could take of this version of Melendez: intense, aggressively caring, and focused on her. She needed to get out of the situation.

“Fine, I won’t waste time arguing. Let’s go.” Neil’s satisfied smirk made her almost want to reconsider, but then a loud cheer and chanting drifted in from next door. Claire quickly gathered up her stuff, and followed Neil out the door before he changed his mind.

TBC.


	2. Chapter 2

Claire jerked awake to the sound of the telephone ringing at her bedside. She glanced at the clock next to it: 5:30 AM. Groaning, she unburied herself from the covers; her alarm was set for 6:00, and it seemed rude to deprive her of that last half hour of sleep. Why would anyone be calling her on the hotel phone anyway?

Grabbing the shrilling contraption, she mumbled a hello into the receiver as she aggressively brushed the sleep-tousled stray curls out of her face. No one would ever accuse her of being a morning person.

The pause on the other end of the line flared her temper again. “Hello!” she said, more alert and clearly annoyed.

“Uh.” The voice stammered. “Is this Claire?”

“Yes, this is Dr. Claire Browne.” Claire wondered if someone from the hospital was trying to get a hold of her and Neil. She sat up and checked her cell phone but didn’t see any urgent messages or missed calls. Then again, the voice did sound kind of familiar. “Who’s calling,” she asked, apprehensive.

Another pause. “Don’t recognize your boss’s voice?” Claire sat fully up in the bed, surprised. And confused. Why would Dr. Lim be calling her so early in the morning in her hotel room? Why did she sound so pissed off? They had a good relationship, and she couldn’t think of anything she’d done lately that would have caused a problem.

Until she remembered …

“There better be a good reason why you’re answering the phone in Dr. Melendez’s hotel room at 5:30 in the morning.”

Claire jumped out of bed as if there truly were something nefarious going on. “No, it’s not what you think.”

“Famous last words,” Lim quipped back.

Now that Claire had shaken herself awake a little more, she started to get angry herself. After all this time, people still jumped to the worst conclusions about her and Neil. Of all people, Dr. Lim should know both of them better than that. The accusation Claire knew was coming felt like a low blow.

Claire sighed. “It’s not like that.”

“Then tell me what it’s like,” Lim asked sternly. “I’ve always given you two the benefit of the doubt even with all the rumors and gossip. Even with the way he treats you. Even given what I’ve seen with my own eyes. All because you both have been adamant that nothing improper is going on.” Lim couldn’t hide her growing frustration at the situation. “What are you two thinking? You’re both ruining your careers. And for what? Is it worth all the lying? All the respect you’re going to lose when people find out you’ve been having an affair? And people are going to find out.”

“You’d tell people that?” Claire accused. “Is that what you think is going on?” 

“I don't care what you're calling it, Dr. Browne. Neil isn’t answering his cell phone, and I guess I know why. This is going to cause a mess for everyone, most of all yourself.” That tone turned Claire’s surprise to pure fury. It was bad enough that the normally even-keeled Lim had jumped to the wrong conclusion, but to talk to her like a child rather than a colleague crossed a line.

It felt personal, and Claire wondered if after all this time, something still lingered between Lim and Neil. Not that it justified the way Lim had chosen to handle this situation. Claire’s disappointment felt heavy and sharp. She’d worked so hard to _not_ act on her feelings for Neil, and even that didn’t seem to matter.

Lim sighed and curtly added, “Just put Melendez on the phone, please. I need an explanation now.”

Unable to check her frustration, Claire exploded. “How's this for an explanation to Glassman and the board: Dr. Melendez and I switched rooms because there’s a bachelor party going on next to mine. I'm sincerely sorry that we didn’t bother to change the names on the rooms because we didn’t expect to be getting phone calls from our boss an hour and a half before we leave for our surgery. I better get off the phone right now and start working on my resume. That is if the shame over this situation doesn’t blacklist me forever.”

The stunned, uncomfortable silence on the other end of the line lingered. “I didn’t—”

“No, you didn’t. Melendez probably didn’t answer his phone because he told me he sleeps like the dead. As I’m sure _you_ know,” she added for the dig. “Call room 1518.” And then Claire hung up on her boss.

Claire flopped down on the bed, angry and keyed up. She grabbed her cell phone and considered texting Neil that his ex was on the warpath because she thought they were fucking. Of course, she didn’t do that, but it would have been satisfying. Instead, she checked the time again and turned her alarm off. Throwing on her workout clothes, she stormed out of her room to burn off some energy.

Hopefully, she could work through some of the emotions Lim had stirred up because she and Neil had a surgery in a few hours to focus on.

* * *

_‘Only 4:00 in the afternoon, and I’m already at the bar for happy hour,’_ Claire thought while sipping a tall glass of gin disguised as a cocktail.

She probably shouldn’t have been drinking at that hour, but she’d officially gone off duty 30 minutes before, and this trip had earned her a month’s worth of booze therapy. Plus, it was Las Vegas; every hour was happy hour. It had crossed her mind to work on her article. Neither her heart nor her attention span were in it, though. With the progress she’d made the night before, it would be no problem to finish by week’s end anyway.

Looking down into her cocktail, Claire figured she should start thinking about dinner. She’d only eaten a small breakfast and lunch, so drinking on a semi-empty stomach wouldn’t be the best idea. Neil remained at the hospital completing paperwork and checking in on the patient. Normally at her own hospital, she’d spend the downtime doing rounds or filling out paperwork of her own. But Neil had sent her back to the hotel saying that he could handle all the follow-up, an attempt to be nice. They’d stay an extra night in case the local doctors needed a consult and then leave back to San Jose midday.

Even with the day’s surgery and busywork, her nerves remained frayed from the morning’s confrontation with Lim. Not that Neil felt any better about the situation judging by his more sour than usual mood.

On the way to the hospital, he’d immediately apologized for Dr. Lim. In fact, Dr. Lim had called her cell phone while she’d been at the gym and apologized herself. Claire hadn’t responded and didn’t think she would until she’d fully calmed down. She liked Lim and respected her a lot. That her boss had jumped so quickly to the worst conclusion about her really hurt. Neil assured her the situation had been handled and that he’d given Lim his own two cents. No one would hear about the phone call, of course. Yet, it was going to make things weird between her and Lim and they all knew it.

Claire had even been pissed off enough to ask whether it’d been some kind of jealousy thing. That had made Neil laugh for the first time that morning. And then he’d explained that Lim had been dating someone for a while, she just hadn’t told anyone – someone he described as a total nerd who looked like a male model. Then it was Claire’s turn to laugh, both at his lack of awareness about how silly that statement sounded coming from him and because it seemed his annoyance at Lim justified letting that secret slip out.

There’d been no time to dwell; their surgery came first, so the only productive course of action was to move on without dissecting the situation. And the rest of the day had gone smoothly, a gift from the universe.

Claire sighed into her drink. She dreaded the fallout from this once they returned home.

“That’s a big sigh. I guess today of all days warrants it.” Neil slid into the chair next to her after draping his suit jacket across the back and signaling for the bartender. He ordered a beer and turned his attention back to her.

“No kidding.” Claire took another sip of her drink. “How’s Tim?”

“Great. Vitals are good, the incision site looks clean and is healing nicely. We did a few more scans just to be sure before I left, but a full recovery seems very likely. They’re going to monitor him here for a few more days before his son drives him back home.” The bartender returned with Neil’s beer and he took a deep pull from the glass to Claire’s amusement. “Did you see his son? He really is a funny guy.”

“Yeah, I sat with him for a while yesterday while we were waiting for the bloodwork to come back. When I first met him, I couldn’t believe he was a comedian. But I guess you’re not at your wittiest when your dad is on the operating room table undergoing an experimental, life-saving surgery.”

Nodding, Neil took another small sip of his beer. “Once he relaxed though, he had some good jokes. And it kept his dad in good spirits, which was nice.” Claire noticed a wistful look on Neil’s face. She’d known almost the whole time they’d worked with each other how much he wanted to be a dad, how sad he sometimes got when he saw fathers together with their kids.

Neil looked at the time and then surveyed the crowds around them. The bar had really filled up since she’d arrived. “You want to go grab dinner somewhere? Maybe drive out someplace? One of my college friends lives out here, and he’s taken me to a few good spots.”

Claire scoffed. “You sure it’s a good idea to be gallivanting around the city together? Anybody could see us.”

“Very funny,” Neil said, sending her an admonishing glance. “It was a misunderstanding. We should put it behind us.” Claire rolled her eyes. “Don’t roll your eyes at me,” he said grinning. “Do you want dinner or not?”

Shoulders sagging, Claire relented. The situation wasn’t his fault. He’d tried to do a nice thing for her and had gotten caught in the crossfire too. “Fine. But no steak.”

Neil made a face. “What, are you serious? I’m a growing boy.” She shot him a skeptical look. “Ok, then no sushi.”

“Fair enough. Indian?”

“In Vegas? No thanks. What about Italian? I know a great place.”

Claire appeared to think about it. “Sure.” They finished their drinks and drove about twenty minutes away to an adorable local Italian restaurant. She ordered a tasty lightly sauced pasta dish while Neil opted for a rather intense looking ossobuco. Neither brought up the morning’s confrontation, instead chatting as they usually did: comfortable banter about her research and his potential new residents and their ongoing disingenuous promises of running a marathon. At the end of the meal, they split a tiramisu and declared themselves almost too full to move.

Claire hated to admit it, but it had been just the thing to take her mind off their disastrous morning.

Driving back to the hotel, they were shocked by how much the city had come alive in just those couple of hours. The traffic, even as far off the strip as they were, stayed congested during the entire drive, and it took them twice as long to get back. Entering the lobby, they saw the bar and restaurant full with long lines and people chatting amiably everywhere. It made them appreciate going elsewhere for their meal.

Barely after 7:00, they decided a run wouldn’t be a very good idea following such a big meal. But a walk along the trail that circled the perimeter of the hotel would help them not feel like such gluttons. Claire distracted herself with their conversation and the familiar comfort of his teasing to get her to race him. He’d always been one for tricks, so she had to watch out for that too. Maybe being away from San Jose had been the change they needed after all. They hadn’t gone running together in a while, and this felt like the next best thing.

When they went their separate ways for the night, she felt okay about things between them. Maybe they could spend this kind of time together without all the guilt over how enjoyable she found his company and undivided attention.

Back in her room alone afterwards, Claire had showered and tried again to work on her article before giving up completely and packing it all up for the night. She thought about going out to buy a mini-bottle of wine from the hotel market, maybe watching a movie. It seemed better than sitting around doing nothing. Convincing herself that she could at least do with a few snacks, she grabbed her key card and headed out.

Of course, she met a familiar face when she wandered into the little store in the lobby.

Neil had changed into a different set of running pants and t-shirt and his hair still looked damp from a shower. Staring at the snack section, he had a bag of popcorn in one hand and a package of sunflower seeds in the other.

“Neither of those sound like a tasty option,” she said from behind Neil.

He startled and then grinned as he recognized her. “I need to stay in marathon shape, remember?” he responded.

Claire scoffed. “You are never going to run a marathon. Get over it.” She nudged him out of the way to grab a package of M&Ms. “And neither am I.” He shrugged as he watched her move toward the wine section. “You bored too?” she called over her shoulder.

Neil joined her as she perused the wine options. “Sad right? We’re in Vegas where there’s about a million things going on at any given time, and I’m watching reruns and scavenging for snacks to avoid hearing that never-ending bachelor party next door.”

“I told you it was annoying! I’m sure you regret switching now.” They both paused at the comment since they’d been avoiding the subject of the morning’s misunderstanding. “Sorry,” she mumbled. “Anyway, it’s such a madhouse tonight. I don’t want to be out in that. Maybe in my younger days?”

Neil’s chuckles drew her attention back to him. “Okay, grandma.”

She threw him a glare. When she turned back to the wine shelf and picked up a bottle to get a closer look, Neil grabbed it from her and checked it out. “Hey!”

“I thought you weren’t in a wine mood?” At least that’s what she’d said at dinner. But it was more that she didn’t want to drink if he wasn’t drinking.

“That was hours ago,” she explained, grinning. I’m within my rights to change my mind, you know.” His smirk at that matched her own.

A familiar playful gleam sparked in his eyes as he replaced the bottle and directed his attention back to her. “Something tells me that—”

Before he could finish, his phone rang. Putting the bottle back on the shelf, he stepped a few paces away to take the call. Judging by the conversation, something had come up with Tim that the hospital wanted to consult on. Neil had officially reassigned the patient back to the on-site medical team, but made himself available for questions.

“Yes, I’m with Dr. Browne now in the hotel lobby. We’ll grab a laptop so we can video conference. Call you in five.” Hanging up he gestured over to the checkout where they paid for their snacks plus a couple of bottles of sparkling water for Claire. By unspoken agreement, he followed her back to her room, which would be the quieter of their two options.

They spent the next half hour walking the doctors through their entire protocol. Turns out, there really wasn’t anything wrong – Tim was resting comfortably. But a family emergency had called away Tim’s primary doctor, and the replacement doctor raised concerns about a lab report that showed an elevated white blood cell count. Not being familiar with Neil and Claire’s procedure, he’d sounded all of the alarms, proclaiming that the two of them had to return to the hospital to monitor the patient.

Neil and Claire assured the doctor that Tim’s tests showed a normal reaction to the medications working their way out of Tim’s system; it would normalize soon. Sure enough, a resident came in during the call to report that the bloodwork had returned to normal parameters. After assuring the team there that everything remained fine, they hung up and simultaneously wilted into the couch from where they’d taken the call.

“I really need a glass of wine after that.” Instead, Claire retrieved a bottle of sparkling water she’d bought downstairs and a couple of cups from the minibar.

“No kidding, but staying hydrated is the next best thing. We should probably act like we’re on call anyway given what we just dealt with.” He watched her pour out water for them before taking the cup closest to him. As he retreated back to his side of the couch, he tapped his cup against hers in a toast, making Claire chuckle at his silliness. “Cheers!”

They sat in silence, decompressing. Claire turned the TV on and flipped to an old movie, more as something to have on in the background than to watch. Every so often, one or the other would refill their cups, steadily going through both bottles.

“What a day,” Neil said. The call had wired them – work mode did that to them. They were both coming down from it little by little.

“I will be glad to get back to St. Bonaventure after this trip,” Claire commented as she curled into the corner of the couch.

They’d left the room’s curtains open and could see the bright lights of Las Vegas displayed in front of them. It seemed so peaceful from their distant vantage point, although, they both knew that on the ground, a bustling mass of people were gambling and partying the night away.

Despite how the day had started, relaxing together after a tough day like this didn’t seem so bad. Or so complicated.

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

“Can I ask you something?” Claire said, tilting her head towards Neil. They’d been enjoying a companionable silence, only the light from the TV, a bedside lamp, and the glow from outside illuminating the dim room. Neil sat next to her on the couch but at the other end, curious as he slightly nodded his assent. “Why was Dr. Lim calling you at 5:30 in the morning?”

The question prompted a raised eyebrow from him, and then he shrugged. “I checked in with her last night before I turned in. She’d been in surgeries and meetings all day and wanted an update. She had a six AM conference call this morning and asked if I needed a wake-up call since…”

“Since you sleep like the dead.” They both laughed. “That makes it even more absurd,” Claire added. “Why would you ask her to call your room first thing in the morning if you were planning on having an illicit affair?” Claire shook her head, clearly annoyed. “So ridiculous.”

“Listen, I know you’re mad. And you have every right to be. But go easy on her. She'd just woken up herself, and she does feel really bad.”

“Well, she should!” Claire shook her head and took another sip of her water. “I’m tired of people making assumptions like that. We’ve been nothing but professional throughout our friendship, and suggesting otherwise is insulting.” And he didn’t even have any idea about the emotions she fought to keep it that way.

Neil scrutinized her for what felt like too long a moment. Then that smirk of his appeared and he looked away. “I guess it’s the price we pay for being so good looking.”

Chuckling, Claire rolled her eyes. “I’m serious, Neil.”

“Me too,” he shot back, again gesturing a toast to her.

“You weren’t there. You didn’t hear the things she said to me.” Just thinking about it made Claire’s temper rise. Neil must have noticed and shook his head.

“No, I didn’t, and you didn’t tell me either. I assume that’s for a reason.” Of course, he knew her well, figured she wouldn’t want to rehash it, for her sake and his.

She sighed. “Does it bother you?”

“Of course, it does. A lot. But I also know the truth and that we’re not doing anything wrong. Lim and Glassman know that. Dr. Garrett and one of his residents play golf together all the time. Me and Park have gone to baseball games on occasion. Andrews was the godfather of one of his resident’s kids, and the less said about Glassman’s treatment of Murphy the better. We all have different ways of mentoring and interacting with our colleagues.”

“But we seem to be the only people taking any heat for it ever.”

Neil looked away. “Yeah, well…” She had a point, and he knew it. Unfortunately, Claire had worked herself up.

“It’s like it doesn’t even matter what we say or do. People are just going to assume whatever juicy piece of gossip will help pass the time. No one cares how hard we work or if our reputations take a hit for their entertainment. As long as every interaction is put under a microscope for people to pick apart any semblance of favoritism, even if 99.9% of the time, everything is perfectly normal. Instead of being like ‘Oh how kind of Dr. Melendez to help out his resident who’s a traumatized hot mess,’ it’s more like ‘Oh look, male and female colleagues hanging out unchaperoned! Gotta nip that in the bud before all the sex happens.’” She waved her cup around, nearly sloshing water all over herself as she gesticulated along with her tirade. “I mean, if that’s how it’s always going to be, it probably would have been better if we actually _had_ hooked up.”

She stopped abruptly, cup resting at her mouth mid-sip as she realized what she’d let slip while on a good and proper rant. When she chanced a peek at Neil’s reaction, he was staring at her, a shocked yet amused expression on his face.

Her awkward laugh didn’t quite break the tension. “Uh, sorry. Obviously, I’m kidding.”

Stammering, Neil blinked a few times and looked away. “I guess that’s one way to deal with the matter.” He took a long pull from his cup and then refilled it again before emptying the bottle into hers. Claire fidgeted as she stared over at the TV. Neil cleared his throat and then turned on the couch towards her, resting his arm along the back. “You know who people should be talking about is Andrews and his minivan. Have you seen that thing?”

Exhaling silently, Claire glanced back at him and snickered, grateful for the distraction.

“I think it’s cute. He does have twins now.”

“I know. That doesn’t make it any more stylish.”

Claire gave him a side-eye for that. “Well, we can’t all be as suave as Neil Melendez.”

Neil shook his head. “Nope.” As they laughed together, everything seemed okay again.

The conversation turned to other people at the hospital whose drama seemed so much more interesting than anything they were doing. It soon became enough to relax and put some of the day’s stress behind them. They absently watched TV for a while until Neil looked over at her.

“This is kind of fun. I know things are fine with us now. But I regret that we had to give up so much of this to keep up appearances.”

“Yeah,” Claire agreed. “You’ve still been a good friend.”

“You too,” he responded. They held each other’s gaze and smiled before breaking contact. “I can’t help feeling sometimes like I could have been a better one, though. And a better mentor.”

“Neil, no.” She turned on the couch to face him more fully. “You’ve been great. And I know I’m not always the easiest to deal with. After next month, you’ll have a new set of problem-children to wrangle.”

Neil groaned a little and flopped his head against the back of the couch. “Don’t remind me.” He turned toward her. “I won’t forget about you, though. You can’t get rid of me that easily.” She was sure he’d meant his words to be a light bit of humor, but the way he’d said it? Like he meant something more with it?

Something flared in Claire then, something sharp and warm and fighting to be released. He was right; they didn’t have too many moments like these anymore, full of contented intimacy. Part of that change in their relationship felt necessary to keep up appearances as he’d said. But another part of it happened because the distance made it easier. She’d put herself through so much to hold in all that she’d worked through, her feelings for him, what she wanted for herself and who to share it with. It all seemed so…hard and unfair. And lonely. At times like these, her desires felt fresh and impossible.

“It’s so dumb, you know.” Neil turned toward her again as she spoke. “Back when all that stuff was happening with the earthquake and Morgan having that surgery on her hands and Shaun getting his heart broken. I had this crazy thought that I …”

Claire didn’t know what now compelled her to go down this road after so much time had passed, after she’d vowed not to burden him with any more of her problems. But something about his company and the way he’d looked at her a moment ago … she couldn’t _not_ let trickle out this thing in her that felt close to bursting.

She flashed him an embarrassed look. “I mean, it was just a second really where I considered maybe …. You know.” She absently pointed between the two of them and then looked away, twirling and tapping the rim of her cup as a sign of her nerves.

Neil straightened as he mentally processed the confession, draping a casual arm against the back of the couch again so as not to spook her.

“But I talked to my therapist about it,” she added quickly. “And it wasn’t even a thing.” Claire had often tried re-telling herself that lie, and it never took. But making sure other people never suspected became second nature. “I was just lonely and still struggling. There was a lot I still needed to work through when it came my relationships with men.”

It wasn’t the entire story. And she’d done her best to downplay the intensity of her feelings. But Claire had admitted enough to potentially throw a monkey wrench in their relationship. She figured Neil would stammer some response, and maybe make an excuse to leave, and she wouldn’t have blamed him for it.

Instead he gave her his full attention, curious, but not demanding anything more from her. And if Claire was honest, it did feel nice to not have to pretend. Even if he didn’t know the whole truth of it, she could be honest about part of it.

Then he cracked a smile, and that relaxed them both. “I’m flattered,” he finally said, now fully grinning.

She joined in his laughter, enjoying his reaction despite it being at her expense. “Stop looking so smug over there.”

“I can’t help it. It’s part of being so suave.”

She threw a pillow at him, and he expertly dodged it, laughing even harder. “Anyway, sorry to get weird on you,” Claire continued as their laughter died down. “Good thing I worked that out. I do value our friendship. So, I’m glad I didn’t screw it up with my—”

“It wasn’t just you.” Neil said, looking away. “I…” He chuckled sadly. “I was lonely too. Dr. Lim – Audrey – and I. The way we ended things, it was sad. And hard. We really cared about each other, and it wasn’t enough to make it work. And after everything with Jessica, and …” He sighed. “And getting dumped twice by women I worked with?”

Claire had to stop herself from reaching out to comfort him. “I wish I’d known how much you were hurting. I would’ve wanted to help you, too.”

“I didn’t want anyone to know. And you did help.” He chuckled uncomfortably. “Even after the first time I got inappropriate with you that night we talked about having kids.” Both their expressions clouded remembering the sadness of failing to save both of their patients then. “Just because it didn’t end up how I thought it would doesn’t mean you didn’t make me feel better that night.” She smiled sadly at that. “I’d always come into work and pretend like everything was fine, but it broke my heart to let those relationships go. I thought putting my energy into just being a good attending and mentor would be the safe choice. Why do you think my last relationship was as far from anyone at St. Bonaventure as possible? Although, in hindsight, dating a yoga instructor homeopath probably wasn’t the best idea either.” They grinned at each other, his self-deprecation helping him show this side of himself.

When he met her eyes once more, there was also a sadness there. “I needed a friend too. Except, I wasn’t that great at going about it either.”

She smiled at him, understanding that kind of struggle, of course, and encouraging him to continue.

“Most of my closest female friends over the years had usually also been my romantic partners. Things with Jessica started out as attraction and romantic feelings with friendship getting wrapped up in that. With Audrey, we’d been more been colleagues than friends. And frankly, the physical part of our relationship came before a lot of our emotional intimacy.”

Claire smirked, “I think we got that when you and Lim started making out in the middle of the ER.”

“We weren’t making out—”

“—you were totally making out,” she said over him.

“Anyway.” He rolled his eyes, though she noticed the humor sparkling in his eyes. “My experience didn’t cover building a totally platonic friendship like we had.” After a beat, he frowned, serious once more. “The point is, nothing about my intentions were inappropriate. And I think neither were yours. I still know that. Claire, when I found you in that stairwell, I finally saw what I’d been too wrapped up in my own problems to see – you were drowning and I should have been there for you, at least as your colleague. Hearing how much you beat yourself up, doubting your optimism and compassion that I’d always thought made you special? It felt like I’d failed you; like I had to make up for that. And then spending time with a woman I respected and not having to worry about relationships or love or balancing all that with work, it felt really good. So good that things got a little blurry.

"I didn’t expect that being around someone,” he paused, shaking his head. “I didn’t expect being around you and your vulnerabilities and struggles and sometimes your idiotic happiness,” he grinned, “would be anything more than helping you see the happiness you deserve. And before I knew it, I became the one who hated going home to an empty apartment, but because I enjoyed hanging out more than I probably should have. I wasn’t exactly sending the clearest signals, but I didn’t realize it at the time.”

Neil sighed. “And when I finally did, I took a step back. I’m sorry if that hurt you. I thought I was being a friend.”

Claire wondered at that, if it explained what had happened between them at the end of her third year. Nevertheless, she felt her cheeks warm and a heat spread up from her chest.

“You were a good friend, Neil. You are. A good friend, that is.” She let these emotions spread through her freely in a way she usually forbade herself, fearful that she’d let herself go down an unhealthy road turned emotional tidal wave toward Neil. Things were getting a little dangerous.

Leaning forward to get a closer look at her, Neil grinned. “Are you blushing?”

“Shut up!” she shouted, burying her face into her shoulder to hide the rising pink tint to her cheeks. “You and your charm strike again? This is why people think you’re always flirting.”

“I told you I couldn’t help it,” he shot back.

“Oh, yes you could. If you wanted to.”

Neil downed the last of his water and placed the cup on the table, letting out a satisfied grunt. He propped his feet up and placed his hands behind his head. Glancing at her, he smiled a bit too wickedly for her tastes. “You know, I think you’re right, though.”

“Now, that’s what I like to hear. You are very clever about turning the charm on and off when it suits you. You and I both know it.”

When she turned to him, she noticed him giving her the strangest look. “No, that’s not what I meant,” he said. “I was talking about you being right about how we should have just hooked up.”

Claire’s jaw dropped and she almost let her cup slip from her fingers. His casual suggestion left her aghast until she finally noticed his face so full of humor. Narrowing her eyes at him, she shook her head. “Ah, I get it. You’re making fun of me.”

“Maybe,” he replied, still grinning.

“I take back that charm thing. You’re terrible, you know that?” He appeared to consider it and then nodded.

“I’ve been told once or twice.”

“I believe it.” Claire took in his smug expression wrapped in the casual way he remained lounged next to her on the couch. Polishing off the last of her water as well, she placed the empty cup on her end of the table. She sighed. “And on that note …” Her tone made Neil turn his attention back to her, probably wondering if she planned to kick him out. His smile faltered as she pushed herself up from the couch.

“Alright, I take it back. I don’t want to get the boot before I’ve had a chance to redeem myself.”

Claire rolled her eyes, as she circled the coffee table to go to the bathroom. “Relax, I’m just going to the bathroom. But so help me god, if you left the toilet seat up, you definitely have to get out.

“I know better,” Neil shot back as she closed the door.

Claire tried not to linger as she washed her hands, but the image of herself in the bathroom mirror gave her pause. Her cheeks still held a pink-dusted tint and she wondered if Neil could sense the heat their conversation had caused, not just in her cheeks but throughout her body.

_‘What am I doing?’_ she thought to herself.

Unable to stall any longer, she splashed water against her flushed face, took a deep breath, and rejoined Neil in the main room.

While she’d been gone, he’d started picking up after them, putting the cups in the recycling bin and cleaning up their snacks. She helped by rolling up the half-eaten bag of sunflower seeds and tying it off with a spare binder clip from her research materials.

He looked ready to reclaim his seat on the couch when she walked over to him and handed over the sealed bag of sunflower seeds. “Don’t say I never did anything for you,” she joked.

Neil took the bag and gazed down at her. “I would never say such a thing.” He’d probably meant it to be equally jovial. Yet she now questioned whether he even recognized how the warmth in his gaze suggested something more than the simple words coming out of his mouth. 

Claire immediately realized she shouldn’t be thinking about his mouth.

Of course, the thought forced her attention to that part of his face, completely ignoring their close proximity and the weight of both their confessions made only moments before. She had no memory of stepping in closer to him; no explanation for why she didn’t pass him by to reclaim her original spot a respectful distance away.

But she’d never forget his reaction: a flash of worry, a moment of surprise, and then unfiltered desire as her lips pressed against his.

Maybe it was working so closely on a patient again or the fact that they were hundreds of miles from home. Maybe the conversation – her admissions and his – had dug up old emotions that couldn’t be held at bay anymore. This one move could ruin everything between them, and she didn’t need more stress in her life over there being something deeper to their relationship.

Or maybe for once in her life Claire could seize the one thing her heart had wanted so desperately before letting her brain talk her out of it.

Neil could have pulled away, laughing nervously as he made light of the whole thing. They’d both downplay anything significant, a lapse due to their fragile emotional walls following a long, tiring day. Afterwards, he’d suggest they call it a night, and then they’d go their separate ways.

Instead, the moment their lips met, it almost seemed out of their hands.

If she’d surprised Neil by making a move, he recovered immediately. She glanced up into his eyes and knew from the passion she saw there – from the heat that matched her own – that he’d been holding in something too. What started out as a chaste but alluring brush of her lips against his, rapidly turned into another taste and then a lingering sweep of mouths, and eventually tongues and hands. He threw the bag of sunflower seeds she’d given him across the table as his fingers came up to softly cradle her cheek. He rested his other hand on her hip, gently gripping her as their kiss deepened. Her hand gravitated to the hardness of his chest and into his hair, holding him to her.

When his hand slid down to her backside and pressed her into him, her moan elicited his hum of satisfaction. Their breathing hitched and accelerated until they had to pull apart to recover. Resting her forehead against his chin, Claire joined Neil in taking in gulps of air, using the need to refill their lungs as an excuse to figure out what the hell they were going to do next. Raising her head, Claire stilled her hands at his chest.

“Neil. I …” Claire couldn’t think of a single thing to follow what they’d just did together. “I mean—”

“Come here,” Neil interrupted, smiling as he guided her back to the couch.

She gasped in surprise as they returned to making out, a sound that quickly turned into a soft moan as soon as Neil tore his lips from hers and trailed open-mouthed kisses down her neck. At this point, she’d practically crawled into his lap, and his grip on her said that he didn’t mind at all.

“What are we doing?” she murmured in his ear, hoping he had a better answer than she did. The glide of her wet lips against his ear, along with the cooling breath of her words, caused him to shiver. She wouldn’t soon forget the satisfaction of being pressed so tightly to him that she could feel him trembling against her.

“I think,” Neil whispered against her lips after moving again to her mouth. Claire responded with a taste of her own. “I think we’re proving everyone right.” He ran his fingers through her hair and pulled back to show her his sincerity along with the genuine pleasure and complete acceptance of his choice to act on whatever he felt for her. Satisfied that she understood him, he kissed her softly, lingering a few beats before going in for more.

They spent long moments like this, kissing and caressing and fondling, at the mercy of their quickly escalating arousal. In the process, they’d somehow maneuvered themselves to lie across the couch, Neil resting comfortably against a couple of pillows with Claire nestled into him. His arms circled her, rubbing along her back and hips; she traced patters into the firmness of his chest up his neck and along the side of his face, finally raking fingers through his hair. When he nipped her along her shoulder as he explored as much of her as he could reach, the sound of her moaning his name drove his hips up into her on instinct.

It also served as a signal to maybe pump the breaks on this runaway train of repressed lust for each other. But instead of adding distance, Claire simply rested her head against his chest and Neil shifted slightly to hold her against him without tempting himself to further grope her.

Their breathing slowed and they lay content, deep in their own thoughts, occasionally watching the flickering TV screen. At one point, Claire reached over for the remote and changed the channel to a baseball game and then nestled back into Neil’s arms. He kissed the crown of her head and further entangled their legs and feet along the length of the couch.

“You hate baseball,” he said, staring down into her soft eyes.

“You seem to know a lot of about the things that piss me off,” remembering his long-ago words to Shaun about falling in love with a friend. “You want to tell me something?” she added, playfully.

His laughter shook the both of them. “Doesn’t hurt to know those things just in case. And you didn’t answer my question. Is there something _you_ want to tell _me_?”

Claire hid her face into his chest, feeling a bit exposed and shy for some reason. When she emerged, she shrugged in his arms. “I’m not paying attention anyway. I’ve got other distractions.” Neil chuckled and began playing with a strand of curls caught between his fingers. Claire smiled as he settled on watching the television. She did hate baseball, but she knew he loved it, and it would be a good distraction for the both of them. Neil seemed content with her choice. After a few minutes, though, he looked down at her again.

“Thinking about what all this means after tonight?”

Claire stroked his side aimlessly where her hand rested. She thought about the question, about the emotions and thoughts swimming in her mind. It surprised her how calm she felt.

“I’m not thinking about that. I’m just enjoying right now.” His gentle squeeze in return felt like enough.

TBC


	4. Chapter 4

Claire didn’t want to move.

Neil lay underneath her, seeming to watch TV as he absently stroked her arm and hair. As she lay in his arms, she could feel the low thrum of his heart against her ear.

“Still enjoying yourself?” he asked.

She hummed as if thinking hard about it. “I’m good. This is nice.” She chuckled against his chest. “But if this isn’t doing it for you, you can let me know. You won’t hurt my feelings.”

Neil’s hand stilled against her head. The words seemed to strike a chord. He resumed his stroking, but instead of returning his attention to the game, he reached over to lift Claire’s chin up to meet his lips.

Once again, their passion intensified, and they were back to devouring each other within seconds. Sensing her approval, Neil gripped her hip with one hand to pull her closer and then pushed them up so he could flip her on her back with him now above her.

“Nope, nothing. Not doing it for me at all.” He laughed at her expression, still shocked at his power move on her.

But any sense of surprise subsided into desire as they returned to making out. Neil grabbed her leg to wrap around himself before cradling her head delicately, moving his lips along her cheek, then her eyes and nose, and finally back to her mouth. Neither seemed uncomfortable about the growing hardness he pressed against her. He did moan into her neck, though, when she slid her hand under his shirt to rake her fingers along his bare back. In response, he reached down to caress the side of her breast.

She felt him grin against her lips when, impatient, she guided his hand to cup her more fully.

He took the hint and squeezed his hand around her, but now seemed a little frustrated himself at the light fleece and thick sports bra between his palm and her naked body. Confident that she could do something about that, Claire nudged him away from her and pulled his shirt off of him in one sweep.

Everyone who’d laid eyes on Neil could tell the man kept himself in good shape with his fitted custom suits and gym routine. But seeing the naked version of him with her own eyes was another thing entirely. She couldn’t wait to get her hands on him and wasted no time reaching up to sample his hard body for herself. Though, laughter was the last thing she expected to hear from him in the moment.

“No, I’m not laughing at you,” he said, seeing her confused expression. “It’s that I could get used to the way you looked at me just now.” She feigned offense at being caught ogling him.

Of course, Neil had a few ideas of his own, so he unzipped her light jacket and slid it off her shoulders. He kissed her neck and chest along the way, making the most of the close proximity. She giggled as he flung her jacket across the room, leaving her in just a sports bra, though not for long – he reached for that as well, tugging it off her until he could take in her nakedness from the waist up.

In just those few moments, it seemed the both of them had made a decision. Not thinking beyond right now freed them to surrender to what they both wanted tonight.

Claire took in Neil’s labored breathing and almost pained expression as he stared down at her, fingers hovering as if scared to finally touch her as he wanted. The intensity of the unmasked hunger in his eyes almost threatened to overwhelm her. Her hand moved to the base of his spine, encouraging him to once again lean into her; Neil was quick to oblige, trembling slightly at her touch. He cupped her breast again, this time touching her freely and fully, thumbing her nipple to hardness as he gripped her. Before long, his mouth had found its way there as well. Claire could feel his smile against her skin when she again moaned his name as the pleasure of it became too much.

When he once again climbed up her body to claim her mouth, Claire boldly dipped her hand inside the band of his loose pants. Neil froze.

“Damnit,” he said, angry. “Damnit. Damnit.”

Claire retracted her hand, feeling the rise of disappointment that his second thoughts had finally emerged. But Neil remained on top of her, taking her errant hand in his and kissing it.

“No, it’s not what you’re thinking, Claire. I want this. I tried not to let myself think about how good you’d feel, and this is better than I’d warned myself about.”

Claire stared up at his pained expression, confused at why he’d stopped her. “Then what—”

“This is a work trip and a last-minute one. It’s not like I was thinking about hooking up when I was packing and …”

Finally understanding, Claire let out a breath in relief. Neil seemed to relax at her realization too. As much as she teased him about being such a stud, she had to admit that he wasn’t the kind of guy to go around packing condoms as a habit.

“I can go downstairs really quick,” he added, “if you want to hold this thought.” He kissed her again softly and lifted off of her.

Claire stopped him, pulling him down to her lips again, which Neil didn’t protest. After a few extra tastes of him, she rested her arms around his neck holding him in place. “Neil, this is Las Vegas. If a room’s got a minibar, it’s got a ‘couples’ pack’ with everything we need. Or being Vegas, they probably straight out call it a ‘sex pack.’ It’s next to the coffee maker for some reason.”

Neil laughed into her shoulder, which made Claire laugh too. “So, you’ve checked it out already?”

She smacked him on the shoulder lightly. “No, but I did see it when I made myself coffee this morning. I didn’t even open it.” He laughed again, nuzzling into her. “So why don’t we go check it out together?”

Still smiling, Neil lifted his head and kissed her chin. “Excellent idea, Dr. Browne.” Before she could prepare herself, Neil had raised up, pulled her into his arms, and lifted them both off the couch, carrying Claire as he strolled across the room. As they passed the coffee maker on the way to the king-sized bed, Claire grabbed the little black box and deposited it on the night stand.

When Neil placed Claire on the bed, she pushed the covers back and moved some of the pillows out of the way to make space. And curious what was in the box, she grabbed it and looked inside. Neil had crawled onto the bed behind her and peeked over her shoulder.

“Condoms. Massage oil. Or is that lube?” Claire placed the individual items on the nightstand. She pulled out a very long and soft cloth item. “Blindfold?”

Neil took the material from her hand to let it coil on top of the nightstand. They both watched the tail of it trail against her wrists as the cloth finally separated and revealed itself as two tightly pressed strips.

“Restraints,” he murmured into her ear.

The heat in his voice made Claire bite her lip to keep from moaning. Instead she turned her head to meet his gaze. “Maybe later,” she replied with a peck to his lips.

He laughed and moved back to again hover over her. “Yes. Because I’ve got some pretty clear plans for you right now.” He glanced at the nightstand. “There are only two condoms there so we’ll have to pace ourselves.”

Claire settled against the pillows, content to let him play this out. Plus, she enjoyed how distracted he got from her being on display for him. “Aren’t you feeling confident?” She ran her hands along his arms as he leaned over her, but he quickly shifted from her reach. He grabbed her hand and kissed it before shifting back completely, a twinkling spark in his amused eyes.

Leaning over to settle his hands at her waist, Neil slipped his fingers inside the waistband of her pants, and pulled, taking her underwear along with them. She barely registered her raised hips complying with his method of stripping her, but she did savor his expression at seeing her completely naked below him. Not to leave her at a disadvantage, he stripped off his own pants and boxer briefs before slowly crawling back on the bed.

“I’ll show you confident,” he said before dipping his tongue between her waiting lips.

They made slow love together, Neil teasing her until she ached and then responding to everything she demanded of him. In fact, he begged her to tell him what else he could do for her, how else he could take her even higher. A harder press of his fingers? Her mouth teasing at that spot until he gasped her name? That one position, but only for as long as he could stand it? When she climbed on top of him, he’d looked up at her almost victorious over how he could wind her up enough to take him on. That is until she guided him inside of her. After that, complete bliss became the only reaction she recognized. Claire would never forget experiencing the purity of that emotion on his beautiful face. So distracted, she didn’t even see it coming when he flipped them over to give in to his body’s urge to push into her. 

The pleasure Neil gave her felt like nothing like she’d experienced before. His naked body against hers, the movement of his muscles underneath her hands as she clawed at his back, the growl of desire as he ground into her hips – it seemed to ignite new senses that had lain dormant during every other sexual encounter she’d had. Her last coherent thought as they moved together, as they breathed each other’s names against damp skin, as they reached their edge and eagerly fell over, as they lay against each other before falling asleep content and entwined, that instinctive mantra rebounded again and again:

Does it always feel this way when you love someone?

* * *

Claire woke to the cry of her phone alarm on the nightstand next to her and noticed the sky just beginning to brighten across the room. As much as she hated to move from the heat and comfort of Neil’s chest against her cheek, she disliked the pulsing sound of her alarm more. Raising up from the covers, she noticed Neil hadn’t stirred at the sound, which made her smile. After last night, he had even more reason to sleep like the dead. In fact, they’d both worn each other out judging by the feel of her muscles straining and popping as she reached over to silence her phone.

Flipping over away from Neil, she checked that she had no urgent messages and then flopped back down on her pillow. She’d set her phone next to the restraints and massage oil that remained untouched on the nightstand. It reignited the lingering but pleasant shock that she’d spent a passionate night with Neil Melendez – a man she loved but thought she’d never be allowed to have. Being with him had been incredible; he’d been an amazing lover and she could tell that she’d been everything he desired as well. The memories of it made her smile into the dark room.

As if hearing her thoughts of him, Neil turned over and moved to where she lay on the other side of the bed, enfolding her in his arms once more. He kissed her good morning, a sleepy but deep taste of her and she grinned even wider. The alarm he ignores, but he senses of her gone from next to him, and he perks right up.

“I see you eyeing those restraints,” he mumbled sleepily into her neck and loosely grasping one of her hands.

“Stop it,” she admonished, letting him stroke across her wrists. “You keep sounding pretty eager, though.” She twisted their entwined hands around until she was the one gripping his wrist. They both laughed.

Lying there in pleasant silence, Claire leaned back into Neil’s warm body, loving the way he settled against her into a lazy slumber. Or so she thought.

“You wanna go for a run,” he asked, moving his leg gently against hers.

Claire groaned. “Uh no. Besides, haven’t you had enough of a workout?” She pressed her hip into his and turned her head to capture his lips again. He reached up to stroke one of her breasts igniting another flare of heat between them. Claire pulled back, returning them to their previous position.

“At the very least, I’d have to run downstairs and get more supplies if we want to keep this up.” He kissed her shoulder, but removed his hand from her breast to rest again at her waist. Sometime in the middle of the night they’d mutually decided to give in to another round of mind-blowing sex. That time she made sure she stayed on top for the finale.

Not liking the idea of him leaving her bed just yet, Claire turned in his embrace, leaning in to kiss him deeply as she looped her arms around his waist. When she knew she’d lured him into a state of distracted arousal, she reached beneath the briefs he’d put back on during the night and took him in her hand, stroking him as he’d done her a moment before. His gasp of surprise and the strangled sound of her name on his lips pleased her.

“There are alternatives you know. If we’re creative.” Claire continued to touch and kiss him across his chest. Neil seemed at a complete loss of faculties as his hands first dipped into her hair before guiding her mouth back to his from where she’d been licking one of his nipples.

“You are playing so dirty right now.” Neil’s breath had quickened as she continued to slide her hand along his length.

Claire smiled against his lips. “I figure you’d like me dirty.” Not giving him time to respond, she deepened their kiss, enjoying the vibration as he moaned into her mouth.

That’s when his phone started ringing.

Tearing away from Claire’s mouth, he cursed violently, which made her giggle. Feeling a little sorry for him, Claire retracted her hand and moved off of him so he could grab his phone lying on the nightstand at his side of the bed. Should could feel him counting to five before answering.

Judging by the conversation, the doctor they’d spoken to from the previous night had deviated from their post-op plan and now Tim’s vitals had become erratic. It didn’t seem life-threatening yet, but if they were still in town, their help would be appreciated. Neil got the basics and assured them that he and Claire would be there shortly. After he hung up, he cursed again and then moved to sit at the side of the bed. He wiped at his eyes and took a deep breath. It made Claire wonder if his anger was about the doctor’s screw-up or the interruption of their pleasant morning.

She moved to embrace him from behind and felt him relax. He grabbed her hand, caressing it for a few moments before kissing it and standing up to gather his clothes.

“I know you’re already packed but I need to get my stuff together. If we get held up, we’re going to have to leave for the airport straight from the hospital.”

Claire nodded, becoming upset at returning to reality so soon. They’d specifically not promised anything beyond this bed and hotel room. It might be the last time she could so freely let herself feel all of these wonderful, turbulent, completely overwhelming emotions for Neil. And she worried about how she’d react to the distant, professional version of him she saw reasserting itself. She’d looked away as he dressed, still unmoving on the bed and clutching the sheet to cover herself. Somehow, despite how they’d spent the last evening, she felt a little too exposed being mostly naked in front of him now. It took her a few moments to come to terms with the silence as Neil crept fully dressed to her side, sitting next to her. She didn’t look at him, worried about what she’d see in his eyes.

Thankfully, Neil didn’t give her time to start down that road of self-doubt. He gently coaxed her chin towards him, cradled her face in his hands, and kissed her thoroughly with an intimacy and passion that had become familiar in such a short time. She moved her hand to cover one of his, holding him to her for a few moments longer.

Finally, he pulled away and looked deeply into her eyes. “No regrets, okay?”

Claire smiled, relieved. Kissing him softly once more, she closed her eyes, savoring the feel of him before returning his gaze. “No regrets.”

He pulled away and grabbed his room key. “Meet you downstairs in 10 minutes.” Claire nodded checking her phone again. Before he opened the door, he looked back with a wicked grin spread on his face. “You should pack the restraints, too, just in case.” And he sauntered out the door, satisfied at winding her up. It made Claire smile, though – likely his intent.

Ten minutes later, they checked out and headed towards the hospital, efficiently shifting to professional mode as they brainstormed a treatment plan for their patient. But after Neil parked and turned off the car, he leaned over for one last kiss, one last taste of her. Then he stepped out of the car, straightened the sleeves on his suit jacket, and waited for her to head inside with briefcase in hand like seasoned professionals.

“Dr. Browne, you ready,” he asked grinning down at her.

“Always, Dr. Melendez,” she responded, following him to the hospital entrance.

TBC

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That sex pack is a thing! They had them in a hotel in Chicago I stayed at for a work conference.


	5. Chapter 5

Claire sat on the couch sipping a glass of wine, thankful for the quiet evening. It’d been a long day, and she really should get some sleep. But she’d worked an extended shift to get the three-day weekend and figured she could sleep in the next day. Unwinding with a bottle of wine and a book seemed more appealing anyway. 

Going back into the fridge for another pour of Riesling, she bypassed the six pack of sparkling water that she'd gotten used to keeping on the bottom shelf. She frowned at the familiar longing such a small reminder had on her. A reminder of missing Neil.

She sighed as thoughts of him resurfaced. He’d likely still be at the hospital babysitting his residents. Nurse Vu mentioned in passing that one of his residents had spooked a patient during prep for a dangerous surgery, so they had to start all over again to get permission to proceed. Claire would have to remember to tease him about how much more trouble this class of residents caused him in comparison to hers.

Of course, she didn’t see him much around the hospital these days because of their schedules. In fact, their trip to Las Vegas nine months ago had been the beginning of a complete change in their routine.

After they’d returned to the Vegas hospital to check on their patient, they’d stabilized him with strict instructions on care. A phone call to Dr. Lim, though, prompted Neil’s more immediate return to San Jose as he had his own surgery schedule that could no longer be delayed. So, they agreed Claire would stay and monitor the patient for the rest of the day and then take the evening flight home. It did give her extra time to work on her article and send a draft to Park. But Claire also wondered if it served as a delay tactic for Lim to avoid seeing her again after their argument. Of course, she could only guess at how Neil would react given that his boss and ex-girlfriend had pretty much been the catalyst for pushing the two of them together.

They didn’t even get much of a goodbye that day. 

However, Neil had called her later that night to make sure she got home okay. They’d talked a bit, decided they should probably cool it, while accepting that they’d had a really, really good time together. He'd joked about never again underestimating sparkling water as an aphrodisiac. She'd made him promise never to use the "what happens in Vegas' slogan to describe their trip. Unspoken were the reservations Neil had about dating another co-worker after such disappointing endings to his last relationships. Not to mention the threat to both their reputations. And while Claire knew her love for Neil was real, she also understood now more than ever that she didn’t need to act on it if it meant making things more complicated between them. She’d been lucky her impulsiveness hadn’t blown up in her face. If she’d tried to pursue Neil back when she’d first realized her feelings, it could have been disastrous.

Things with Lim blew over. And she and Neil continued as they had, but with a surprising ease to their relationship – and a fair amount of playful yet discrete sexual tension at times. Mostly, they respected the mutual, mature decision to remain friends and colleagues. Neil got new residents and became busy showing them the ropes and dealing with their mishaps. Claire kept pushing herself to be the best surgeon she could be and building on her already excellent rapport with her co-workers and reputation at the hospital.

Sometimes it felt like old times. When Shaun had an intriguing medical mystery he couldn’t quite work out, she and Neil both sat with him for hours until they’d come up with a solution. Shaun had even given Neil’s shoulder a happy rub with his elbow as he ran out to talk to the patient. They’d sat next to each other at the staff meeting when Glassman announced Morgan as the lead on a special research project based on a series of articles she’d published during her last year of residency. Neil smirked at Claire, expecting her to be annoyed with her former rival. But Claire had been happy for Morgan and knew she’d needed something like this to make the most of her time left as a surgeon.

They’d socialized together at Alex’s going away party when a spot finally opened up that would allow Park to move closer to his ex-wife-slash-girlfriend and son in Phoenix. Neil had even invited Claire to take a turn around the dance floor with him. He teased her about keeping her hands to herself when dancing with the Prom King, and she playfully suggested he direct his concern at the new trauma doctor who kept making eyes at him. Neil needled her about being jealous to which Claire didn’t respond.

They’d handled things pretty well, she thought. Like mature adults. Funny how the littlest things could disrupt the best intentions.

It started with one of his residents delivering a share-size bag of M&Ms to her after she lost a patient in a long, complicated surgery. To cover his tracks, he’d told the resident that he’d picked up the wrong kind at the cafe and knew Claire would eat them from her days on his rotation.

A few days later she joined him for lunch and offered him some of her chicken fettuccine. He accepted and then cut off a piece of his lasagna for her.

A couple weeks later during one of their rare runs together, he noticed that she’d worn _that_ fleece jacket to ward off the evening chill. As she pulled it on and zipped it up, his eyes followed every move, a familiar heat in his expression. When he met her eyes again, he raised a brow, questioning whether she’d chosen to wear it on purpose for him.

Not long after that, Claire caught Neil walking past her in the cafeteria as she studied a case file for a surgery later that afternoon. He’d stopped for only a moment to leave a bottle of sparkling water on her table before winking at her and moving along.

The following week, she made sure that when Neil opened his desk drawer to grab his keys before heading home, he’d find them resting on a folded square of cloth that unfurled into two strips of familiar black fabric.

They were squarely on dangerous ground. But it had turned out to be for nothing since soon enough, they’d had their falling out.

First, she’d heard that he’d gone out with the new trauma unit doctor that she’d teased him about. She tried to convince herself unsuccessfully that she didn’t feel any kind of way about it. Then he’d stolen one of her patients after learning she’d get to try a cool experimental procedure that they’d talked about once during her residency. He’d used his “Attending Card” and convinced Lim to reassign the surgery to his team as a teachable opportunity. Claire had been furious, fueled by her complicated feelings over his dating someone else.

Of all the people she could vent to, she ended up confiding in Dash. They’d remained close after deciding not to date, and he knew her better than most anyone, being one of her oldest friends at this point. She’d told him everything: about how Neil had helped her through a tough time, the favoritism complaints, the rumors about them, and then finally that amazing night together in Las Vegas. Dash had laughed.

_‘So that explains it.’ Claire looked at him, puzzled. ‘You didn’t see him when I picked you up for lunch the other day?’ She shook her head. ‘If looks could murder, you’d be singing at my funeral right now.’_

Claire hadn’t known what to do with that, although it somehow annoyed her more.

As her irritation with him festered, she decided to confront him in his office about the surgery. Maybe if he admitted that he’d wronged her and apologized, she’d feel better. That hadn’t gone to plan either.

Oh, she’d coldly read him the riot act, none of which he denied, and then ranted about his unprofessionalism and sabotage. When he sat calmly and didn’t respond how she wanted, she made a snide remark about his dating life. That, in turn, triggered his temper and he sniped right back with a wisecrack about Dash. She accused him of calling her a whore; he accused her of doing just that to him first.

Finally, he admitted that he stole the surgery from her because he’d overheard the patient making comments about being attracted to his doctor and making all kind of sexual remarks about her. He knew if he told Lim the real reason why he wanted the surgery, it made him look suspicious, and Lim might not have taken Claire off of it anyhow, opting to handle it herself. So, he made another kind of appeal and won. Neil had probably thought his honesty would lead to a truce, but it only made her madder, going off about men in the hospital treating her like a damsel in distress who needs protection. She’d told him she was tired of men playing games with her.

That set him off again. He walked around to his desk and opened the top drawer, grabbing the scraps of cloth she’d left him. She wondered why he’d never taken it home; wondered if that would have seemed too tempting or if he just liked the idea of having a reminder so close to where they most often saw each other. He waved the wad of material at her and told her he wasn’t the only one playing games; asked her why she left that for him. He tossed it to her and she barely caught it, watching it unspool around her fingers.

Instead of responding, she turned and left. They didn’t speak a word to each other for nearly a month. Claire was miserable, and from the brief glimpses she’d seen of Neil, so was he.

Then one day, he showed up at her table in the cafeteria and dropped a packet of M&M’s beside her before walking away.

Swallowing her pride, the next day, she left a bag of sunflower seeds on his desk.

He forwarded her an email from the trauma unit doctor thanking him for talking to her son about attending Stanford.

She responded by sending him the digital invite link for Dash’s wedding to a woman named Nina happening the following month.

When he briefly dropped off a copy of the case report he’d written on the patient he’d stolen from her, she saw he’d given her credit for the initial diagnosis and surgical protocol. On a post-it note on the cover he’d written “Sorry for being a jerk.”

When she showed up at his apartment later that night and kissed him before he could say a word, he pulled her into his embrace without hesitation. Later as they lay together, Neil gazed into Claire’s eyes, stroking her cheek with delicate fingers she’d brushed against a million times in the OR.

“I love you, Claire.”

She smiled up at him, turning her head to kiss his fingertips trailing along her skin. He traced a finger against her lips, taking her in with wonder.

“Finally!” She joked. He laughed and pulled her in closer, playfully nipping her on the shoulder. When their giggles subsided, she guided him to her waiting lips for a slow, deep kiss. Pulling back, she raked her fingers through his hair and smiled sweetly, which triggered one from him as well.

“I love you too, Neil.”

* * *

A sound behind her broke Claire out of her thoughts and memories. She put her glass of wine on the table and walked towards the front of the apartment. Neil had just come in, dropping his briefcase in the usual spot by his front door. Once he spotted her, his face lit up in surprise as he hung up his coat and quickly pulled her to him in greeting.

“I thought you’d be asleep,” he said kissing her soundly. When she returned the peck, he squeezed her and then let her go to get himself a glass of water.

“I’m close. But I’ve barely seen you all week. I wanted to stay up so I could hear whether you were able to finish up the surgery tonight.” She walked closer to where he stood by the refrigerator and rubbed his back in soothing circles.

Neil sighed. “We ended up doing the surgery and the residents are monitoring him overnight.” He drained the rest of his water and then moved over to the minibar to poor himself a finger of whiskey. “Lim said their lecture can wait until the morning.”

“What a day.” As soon as Neil recorked the bottle, she led him over to his couch she’d been lounging on while she waited for him to come home. She sat down and pulled him beside her. After allowing her to retrieve her wine glass, he put his arm around her and pulled her close.

“The good news is that if the patient recovers nicely tomorrow, I’ll have the rest of the day and the weekend off. And since I know you have it off as well, I was thinking maybe we could go on an adventure.”

Claire laughed. “Oh yeah, because our life screams adventure these days.” With their schedules, they spent a lot of time sharing meals at her apartment or lounging around his as they were tonight. Keeping their relationship low profile meant less adventure and more an embracing of domesticity. It agreed with them.

“That’s even more reason to go. We could drive out to Tahoe. You liked it the last time we went.”

Taking it under consideration, Claire shook her head. “Don’t you think it’ll be crowded?” Neil nodded at that.

“Monterey?”

“Boring.”

Neil stroked her hip suggestively. “I’m sure I can find a way to keep you entertained.”

Claire leaned up to kiss him, fingering one of the buttons straining against his hard chest. But she pulled back when he tried to linger. “If that’s how you want to spend the weekend, we could do that here just as well.”

Neil contemplated that too. “True. But it’s not like we could do anything else. Unless you count visiting my sister or my parents and that’s not really my idea of a romantic weekend.”

“I would love to see both your sister and your parents, actually.”

“No way,” Neil laughed. “I want you all to myself. And they already love you way too much. You all will just gang up on me.”

“Such a baby,” Claire replied but snuggled further into him. “Isn’t it crazy that all those years on your service and people constantly speculated about us hooking up when nothing was going on? Then once we _are_ hooking up and practically living together, no one is the wiser.”

“Of course, it’s crazy, but I’m not going to tempt fate about it.”

“Yeah, me neither.” Claire mulled over his question some more. “Camping?” They vetoed that in unison.

They let the matter drop, laying together as they sipped their drinks and relaxed. Neil continued to stroke Claire’s body wherever he could reach, not looking to arouse, but she knew he wouldn’t mind if she got there anyway. She slipped her arm up his back, massaging the tense muscles and feeling him let go of the day’s stress.

“I’ve got a crazy idea,” he said. “Why don’t we go back to Las Vegas. We could get a nice room for cheap this time of year, and we’ve both got plenty of airline miles.”

“You don’t even like Las Vegas and neither do I. The last time we were there, we spent the whole time avoiding all of the Las Vegas things.”

“That’s because we were working. And I don’t hate Las Vegas. In fact, I had a pretty great time last I was there.” He squeezed her side and smiled down at her. Claire rolled her eyes.

“Be that as it may, what in the world would we do there?” Before he could respond, she put a finger to his lips. “What in the world would we do there that we wouldn’t be doing here anyway.”

Neil pretended to think hard about it. “There’s plenty we could do. Share a jacuzzi bath or share one of those big showers with the special showerhead.” He grinned at her laughter, chuckling himself over his very one-track options. “We could finally give those restraints a try.” At that, he tickled her side to tease. “Seriously, though, we could actually go out to dinner in public or go to a show or dancing, hell, just walk and hold hands.” He kissed her forehead. “I wish I could do all of those things with you.”

“I know. And it would be nice to not be so paranoid, even when we’re at home.” He smiled down at her use of the word ‘home’ to describe their time together. Then she giggled. “Remember that time we were hanging out here and your med school buddy showed up drunk and heartbroken on your doorstep. You left me hiding out on the deck for two hours!”

“He knew too many people at the hospital. He would have blabbed for sure. You were fine, you had a full glass of wine and your phone when I left to answer the door.”

“Yeah a lot of good that did when I had to go to the bathroom. And you kept ignoring my texts to get him out so that I could pee.”

Neil cracked up at that memory. “Oh my god, that’s right. I had to finally fake a text from my mom asking me to check my mailbox for something she’d sent and then drag him downstairs with me.”

“I’ve never run to pee so fast in my life than when I heard the door close after you. And then you had to text me when you were on your way back up so I could hide in your bedroom … for another hour and a half.”

“I felt bad for the guy! I was being a good friend. But I understand that you were not so amused.” They laughed again, enjoying the humor at the struggles of their secret romance. “That’s why it would be great to get out of here. No distractions, no surprises, just freedom.” Claire hummed in contentment at that promise. That’s exactly how it felt the first time they’d come together in Las Vegas. Free and open. Unafraid. 

She sighed and rested her head against his chest. “You’re making a good case for Las Vegas. I guess as long as we don’t get into too much trouble, we’ll be fine.”

“Us? Trouble? What could possibly happen?”

“You’d be surprised!” They both chuckled and continued on in pleasant companionship.

After a while, Neil tensed for a moment before idly stroking Claire’s arm again. She looked up at him to ask what was wrong, but she stopped at seeing his wistful expression. Gazing down into her eyes, he said, “Actually, there is some trouble I’m thinking we could get into. I’m hoping you like the idea.” He leaned in, whispering his desires into her ear as if speaking them too loudly would somehow lessen the intensity of it. Claire’s eyes widened as she again sought out his eyes, checking for sincerity or the familiar signs of a joke. She found none, only an excitement mixed with a bit of wonder.

“And we’ll definitely take the restraints with us,” he added.

“You are so crazy,” she said and kissed him slowly, sweetly. “How about I go help you pack and then we can start the vacation early.”

“I like the way you think.” He rose and reached for her hands to pull her up, too. With their arms around each other they shared one last kiss before retiring to the bedroom to continue the conversation.

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A short little epilogue.

“You’re what?” Glassman said.

Neil tried not to laugh at the man’s reaction since he was potentially in enough hot water. Claire did her best to appear as calm and as neutral as she could. 

“Married, Aaron. We’re married. Have been for months.

“Well, this changes things.” Glassman leaned back in his chair and frowned. He’d offered Neil the interim Chief of Surgery position the day before after approving Dr. Lim’s sabbatical. Andrews wasn’t interested, more focused on his family and not excited about a placeholder position.

Neil frowned. “Why? We’ve already talked to HR this morning, and they’re satisfied. We barely work together anymore being on different rotations and Claire reports to Dr. Singh anyway. The question of undue influence is about as mitigated as it can get.”

“HR said that?” Glassman asked. Neil nodded. After a few moments pause when it seemed he might relent, Claire and Neil shared a quick, hopeful glance between them. Glassman sighed and considered the two doctors in front of him. “Alright,” he replied, smiling a little. “It must be serious. And you’re lucky I like the two of you. It turns out Dr. Lim is going to be out longer than anticipated anyway.”

Concerned, Neil flashed a questioning glance at Glassman. “Something wrong?”

“Wrong? No. She’ll be taking her sabbatical as planned. We’re still working out the start date and then another six months of maternity leave.”

“Maternity leave!” Claire and Neil repeated.

Glassman grinned at their obvious surprise. “You’re not the only one who knows how to keep a secret apparently.

“That’s …” Neil’s gaze met Claire’s and they both laughed. Glassman stared at them, confused by the reaction.

“There’s one more thing,” Claire said.

Quick to pick up on the subtext, Glassman practically exploded out of his chair. “You’re kidding!”

“Not kidding,” Neil said, sharing a loving look with his wife.

“Very much pregnant, too,” Claire confirmed.

Glassman walked around his desk to perch himself in front of them. He fixed his stoic glare at one and then the other. Neil squirmed a bit in his seat while Claire cleared her throat and glanced nervously at Neil. Finally, Glassman stood and gestured Neil to follow him. But instead of leading him out of his office, he embraced him, offering his congratulations and a genuine beaming smile. He followed suit with Claire giving her a fatherly peck at the top of her head.

“I’m so happy for you two. I don’t know how you’ve kept all of this under wraps for so long but you’ve both had a lot of practice, I guess. Now get out of here. I’ve got some board members to call to let them know things are handled over here.”

Neil and Claire smiled at Glassman and then each other as they left his office, a little dazed, but so relieved to have this huge thing off their chests. Claire realized Neil was close to bursting if he couldn’t freely boast about all of the good things he had in his life right now.

She’d been softer about it, more nervous, strangely. But she looked forward to sharing her life more openly too. To celebrate her husband and best friend and watch him glow from finally having the chance to be a father.

As they left the president’s office and went back to work, they stopped where they'd split off to continue their day - Neil down the hall to his office and Claire to the elevator to reach hers.

“Did you bring it?” Claire asked. Neil nodded.

She reached into her pocket and pulled out the ring he’d bought for her that weekend in Vegas six months ago during their impromptu vacation. Neil produced a matching one from the pocket of his blazer. They slid each on simultaneously, remembering the little chapel where they’d exchanged rings and vows. When they returned home, his mother had been so mad she hadn’t been there, so they’d promised her a proper church wedding when everything was finally out in the open. She’d probably be the first call Neil made.

Neil took her hand, running his thumb across the ring before bringing it up to his lips for a quick kiss.

“I’ll see you later, Mrs. Melendez.” He laughed at her reaction: a roll of the eyes with a matching grin pulling at the corner of her mouth.

“That’s _Doctor_ Melendez. Browne-Melendez to avoid confusion. And not at work,” she chastised. “Too confusing.”

“Yes, Dear.” Claire groaned and walked away.

“You’re terrible,” she responded.

“That’s why you love me,” he called back, now unafraid of who might hear.

Claire stopped and turned back to him. “Maybe,” she said and then disappeared toward the elevators, a warmth spreading in reaction to the adorable grin on Neil’s face.

She’d finally gotten everything she’d wanted. They both had.

THE END


End file.
